Falling in love was once easy. Two people meet and gravitate towards each other. The chemistry is built effortlessly and the emotion flows naturally. The two are happily committed to one another and foolishly think that the relationship they’re in right now will last a lifetime.
Falling in love gets harder, especially after we had our heart broken by someone we truly love. Someone we once thought will be our better half in some years time.
This time, not only the heart that decides. The brain gives it’s perspective too. It has a lot of considerations and unnecessary (or sometimes necessary) anxieties about us throwing ourselves to the same feeling that had destroyed us in the past.
It’s not merely about i like him and he likes me anymore. We start to think about whether it is worth all the risks. We ask repeatedly to ourselves if it’s truly the love that we deserve. We over analyze everything. We doubt our feelings. We become hesitant in falling in love. It is a tight war between denial and acceptance, we can’t seem to be honest about our own feeling because we’re too afraid of another disappointment.
Some people then choose to be alone and avoid falling in love.
A guard is built, strong and steady, to protect the heart from allowing another bad person to enter. Yet some people say that we will only get better once we open our heart. Let the new beginning comes in. So then we try, slowly letting other people come. And everyday we pray that this time is going to be different, this time the love will stay forevermore. When one day it feels different and it somehow makes perfect sense with this person, we have to be honest. If it’s love then it’s love. And it’s okay to love.
When we love, it feels somehow terrifying. But… it’s okay, it’s just love.
❤️ Atiqah Zulfa Nadia
Have I told you that I love wedding very very much? Well, if I haven’t, I do. I love how the ceremony radiates happiness to people and brings a warm feeling in their hearts. To me, it’s magical. There’s something about it that cannot be described into words. This weekend I witnessed the wedding of two of my best friends. It got me to think, again, about finding the one.
The story of how my best friends met their spouse is somewhat unexpected. The first best friend, he met his wife when he was traveling. Back then, one chance came to him. One little chance that he bravely took, which was to talk to the girl, brought him to his true love. Who would guess that a small talk can help you in finding the one? The second best friend is not much of a difference. The man she’s now married to has never crossed her mind before. Without warning, he came to her life and decided that she is the one. Then she said yes.
Love comes in the most unexpected way, some said. For the two of my best friends, it’s true. But I personally think, sometimes love comes to us and somehow we already predict that love is going to happen. So it’s also expected and pretty munch predictable. Because for some people, they have built a long and strong relationship before they decided she/he is the one. Some others are trapped in a platonic relationship until they finally realize that they are a match made in heaven. Every love story is unique. There’s no two identical love story. Thus, I believe, we have to be open to many different opportunities and possibilities. The expected, the unexpected, the ‘too good to be true’, the ‘there’s no way I can be with her/him’.. anything. And once we realize that we have settle our heart to someone, we should be truly honest with ourselves, admit and embrace the feeling. Because in any love story, whether expected or unexpected, all it takes is one chance and a bold courage to make it come true. Without being honest with ourselves, how are we going to see the opportunity and build the courage?
As Stevie Wonder said, for in romance all true love need is a chance.
❤️ Atiqah Zulfa Nadia
I have been scrolling down through my old blog since the afternoon. It brings me nostalgic kind of feeling.. I have been blogging since 2011 and there were just so many things, so many stories and feelings. I can’t help myself to smile.
One thing I realize is that other than the style of my writing, everything else stays the same. I often talk about happiness and life. I always write a birthday post (except on my 22nd birthday, I don’t know why). Porridge still is my favorite food. Airport has always been one of my favorite places on earth. I was more open back then, I wrote pretty much in daily basis and I talked a lot about my life – which I actually still do, but I now wrap it differently.
After all, it’s good to know that some things stay the same and remain unchanged 🙂
❤️ Atiqah Zulfa Nadia
This one post is rather spontaneous than planned. I was having a writer’s block before and then I decided to re-read my old blog, the one I wrote when I was in university. I found one article and I think it will be nice to re-write it. And though I can just copy and paste the words here, for the purpose of having a consistent writing style, I have to re-make the article. Please enjoy 🙂
Several days ago I re-opened my postgraduate personal development plan assignment. For that assignment, I had to create a survey and ask people (obviously those who knew me) what they see as my strength and weakness. I saw a consistency in the respondents’ answers. Most of them thought that calm, well organized, well prepared, very detail in planning, and a good planner are my strengths. I didn’t realize that I am such a person, until the survey. The survey was conducted a little bit more than a year ago. And today, during my visit to my blog that I wrote five years ago, I found a piece of writing about keeping calm. I was sharing how I learned to keep calm in that article. There were seven ways to keep calm that somehow worked for me. Guess what? The second one was to be well-planned. So, who I was in 2016 (I hope it is still who I am now), has been there since five – or many more – years ago. Characters and habits take a good deal of time to built, yes?
Here’s the 7 ways to keep calm (as written in 2012, but I edited the explanation a little bit).
- Pray. Before anything, pray. Sometimes we do everything first, then pray last. Well, it should be the other way around. God promises that He will not burden anyone beyond what he can bear. So this is a very good reason to stay calm and not over-worried about something.
- Arrange the schedule and don’t be a deadliner. There comes a time when we have too much on our plate. The only way to sort them out is to get all of them done. Make plans, set a priority rank for each task, and do it one by one. Having an everyday to-do list is a life savior. And never delay what we can do now because, as wise man said, later sometimes become never.
- Make sure to have some fun. Even in the most hectic time and the hardest situation, allow yourself to have some fun once in a while. It is important to keep ourselves calm and to release the stress. Don’t go too overboard, but do have fun.
- Self-assuring. Repeat to yourself that this too shall pass. Remind your self to be calm. Take a deep breath. And do it all over again every time you are about to explode.
- Be opportunist. This may sounds negative but what I actually meant was to realize when an opportunity comes and to know when to take it. This will get things done even quicker and solve problems too. Thus, no need to be anxious and worry.
- Focus. Multitask is the opposite of a catalyst. It will lower our productivity. We can handle so many things at the same period of time. But each of them has to has a slot time. Focus on one task at a time. This is why point number 2 is utterly important.
- Pray. Again. When we have put all our efforts, pray. ‘God, please do not make this world as our biggest concern.’ If nothing is a big concern, then why worry, right?
Keep calm, and… well, just keep calm because it feels good.
By the way, if you want to read the original article, you may read it here.
♥ Atiqah Zulfa Nadia